Insecurities are loud - pass the microphone anyway


If you are successful in whatever you are doing, it is inevitable that some people will envy you, sometimes even without realising it. This jealousy becomes toxic when they actively take steps to belittle you, put you into humiliating situations and when they question your adequacy on a daily basis. When you are involved in a case of toxic jealousy, first it might seem like they are 'above' you because they might seem a lot more confident, qualified, bold etc.
The key thing for you to do is realise that you are not subordinate or less than them. Their mocking is not about you and your qualities, it is about them and their hidden insecurities. They are jealous because they feel that you have something that they don't. As soon as you understand that they spread gossip about you not because there is something wrong with you but because they can't deal with their own insecurities, you are free. And this is where it gets easier for you. Of course, self-reflection is key to better yourself, but you don't need to carry the weight of the 'why do they bully me' on top of that.
It will of course never be easy to deal with a situation like this, but here are some tips on dealing with it.


You got a problem? [Copyright Bulletproof Journalist]


1. Be you
The best way to fight gossip and mocking is showing people who you are. It won't take long for the people who really know you/want to know you to figure out that there is a big inconsistency with what they have heard and what you are like. Those who are worth having around will never decide whether they like you or not because they heard something from someone. They will seek clarification. If you are not in the wrong, the clarification will be your behaviour, you don't need to try to impress or influence people.

2. Remember: insecurities are loud
You need to be prepared to listen to these people constantly telling how great their life is, how good friends they have, how much they do for a cause, how irreplaceable they are and the list goes on...probably forever. If someone forgets to acknowledge their importance, they will create drama so people praise them. For those who are not blinded by this 'play', it will eventually become obvious that they are putting on a show because they worry that if they just do a job without telling it to everyone, they will become insignificant. The feeling of worthlessness is something they want to avoid at all costs and they are willing to pay with your mental well-being.

To be continued.

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