The Bulletproof Journal

I am on a meeting. One person starts saying negative things about another's private life but they are not here to hear the comment. But I am. I don't need to hear it out to know that it has no relevance to the supposedly professional topic we are discussing. The world slows down as I shift in my chair. My head reviews my options in a matter of a second: I can stay silent since I am not personally involved and it is easier anyway. But as I weigh up this possibility, I already know that it goes against what I believe in. I don't think it is acceptable to try to bring someone down by spreading gossip. I fight the urge to just keep the peace and the need to be liked. Finally, I interrupt the person as politely as I can. I ask them to stop firmly but without a negative tone. Silence. People are taken aback, some roll their eyes, but I know I did the right thing. And that is all that matters.  [Copyright Bulletproof Journalist] There are countless times in our lives when ...

Have you ever felt that you have no idea where to go from where you were at life? Have you ever felt lost? So overwhelmed by choices that you couldn't decide or left with seemingly no choice? You are not alone. Feeling uncertain about what to do or if you chose the right path doesn't make you a lost cause. It might feel like the worst possible way to be, but sometimes lost is exactly what you need to be to find out which is 'your way'. I had multiple times in my life when feeling lost lead me to great discoveries, but let me tell you about how I turned one incident around. About two years ago, I got a really big punch in the face from life and it left me wondering who I am, what I want and where I am heading. When I felt the most lost, I have decided that it was time to just let go of everything that WAS and focus on what IS. Chairish the new path [Copyright Bulletproof Journalist] I had a tough look at my friendships, my clothes, my habits and my personality a...

You don't need to be a professional to be able to help people. In fact, there is absolutely no skill, no equipment, no sacrifice needed to help others. Smiling at a stranger on a street might not be a big deal for you, but it might mean the world to that other person who feels really awful. Undoubtedly, there are times when you need more than just a smile though and that can be a huge responsibility. I'll tell you why you should try regardless. We have no idea sometimes how much our words and actions can hurt others. A 'bit of a banter' can easily turn into someone questioning why are they so worthless and disrespectful behaviour can often leave people thinking they are not enough. Realising this is the first step towards becoming a 'bigger' person. Now, turn this around. Imagine a world where your words can make someone's day, where you can lift people up (in some cases both literally and figuratively). Congratulations, you live in this world. Sure thing, ...

So far, we have talked about how when someone tries to make you feel like you are worthless, it is their (toxic) way of dealing with jealousy coming from their own insecurities. I have written about ways that can help you handle a situation like this. (See post 'Insecurities are loud - pass the microphone anyway') Let's continue with ways of coping with someone who tries to mock you and make you seem *insert negative adjective here* in front of others. 3. Talk about it If someone bullies you and mistreats you, don't keep it to yourself. It is a huge strain on your mental health to be subjected to mocking so make sure that above all, you prioritise your well-being.  Talk about how you are feeling to a friend, a family member or even on an online listening service. Don't be afraid to reach out to a therapist or any other professional help if you are struggling. It is also important, as terrifying as it may sound, to talk about it with your bully. We tend to forge...

If you are successful in whatever you are doing, it is inevitable that some people will envy you, sometimes even without realising it. This jealousy becomes toxic when they actively take steps to belittle you, put you into humiliating situations and when they question your adequacy on a daily basis. When you are involved in a case of toxic jealousy, first it might seem like they are 'above' you because they might seem a lot more confident, qualified, bold etc. The key thing for you to do is realise that you are not subordinate or less than them. Their mocking is not about you and your qualities, it is about them and their hidden insecurities. They are jealous because they feel that you have something that they don't. As soon as you understand that they spread gossip about you not because there is something wrong with you but because they can't deal with their own insecurities, you are free. And this is where it gets easier for you. Of course, self-reflection is key to...